Live What You Know

Waking up is more than it seems. You KNOW more than you've ever been "taught"! You chose to be here now. Make yourTRUEself proud!

Category: Relationships

May 1, 2014

The Frequency of Love

Love will immediately enter into any mind that truly wants it.
(p. 55) —A Course In Miracles

We pick our vibrational frequency.  We decide what we see when we look, what we feel as we experience and what we hear as Life is speaking to us.  We choose our vibration we send out into the world and we pick what vibrational frequency we will receive back.  The only true frequency is the vibrational frequency of Love.  All the rest is noise and reactionary fear-based emotions.  It’s like the fuzzy sound on an old radio as you try to tune into your desired channel.  Love is the desired channel.  All the rest is fuzzy noise, it’s not real.  It’s nothing.  Nothing happened.  Once we can break free from reactions and fear, we can raise our energy vibration and watch it go out before us to transform all that is around us.  We are no longer at the mercy of what levels everyone else is vibrating at.  We can use our energy wisely and bring more love into every encounter, thought or action.

An interesting thing about Love — you cannot feel it from outside yourself, no matter how much is coming your way.  Love comes from within.  We cannot experience it outside of us without generating it and sharing it from within.  No matter how someone else loves us, we cannot feel it until we have experienced the love within.  This is how loneliness is possible.  Loneliness is simply the outcome of not generating the love within; it is turning away from the source within and instead trying to find it outside of ourselves.  Love cannot be found outside of us, only within.  Love is our true essence, it is what we are.  Once we can dwell in the frequency of love, we can no longer experience loneliness because we are never without the source of Love within.

Feeling lonely can be a blessing.  It can make us figure out what we have within.  We must feel it and figure out what it is telling us.  If we run from it, it will only worsen.  From the time I was a small child I had what felt like a deep sadness and the only way I could explain it was to call it “the lonely feeling.”  I was tortured by my loneliness and I found it so very difficult to understand at a young age.  I was often surrounded by people who loved me when I was feeling it and it felt like the worst feeling in the world.  To be lonely in the company of others is deadening.  It felt like an overwhelming urge to cry without a known reason why.  Now, I am so grateful I suffered with these feelings because that suffering brought me to seeking for meaning at an early age.  It also brought me to make many mistakes along the way as I tried to ease my loneliness.  Lucky for me, I believe that sometimes mistakes are simply shortcuts to figuring out what we need to learn.  I learned a lot throughout the years, sometimes repeating mistakes and sometimes hearing the messages.  This lonely feeling continued to be my background hole I would sink into in tough times.  Until I was able to understand that it was me choosing and creating it, it plagued me.

Life has been teaching me to turn towards Love and away from the lonely feeling over the years.  Life has shown me that the Love I can turn to is actually the real me.  Life has shown me that I Am much more than I ever dreamed possible and so is everyone else.  Life has shown me that I can’t make that choice for others, they must generate their love from within as well; that way they can meet their real selves. God/Universe designed the perfect love curriculum for us!

There are many types of love.  People like to label the different versions.  I am not really interested in labeling love anymore.  I just want to dwell in it and use my energy to help others do the same.  The key to using  your love energy well is to expect it to work.  We must expect it to go out before us and surround us.  We must be centered, calm, still and sure of our intentions.  We must stay in the frequency of who we are and not sway into reactions over our outer circumstances.  We must expect that we can dwell in love and act from love at all times.  When we feel drained, we must learn to replenish and get back into the frequency of love right away.  We don’t need to waste any more time in the fuzzy noise of life.  Let’s Love.  Let’s Live.

Accessing Love Ideas:

Look deeply in the face of another.
Watch a child play.
Look at flowers in stillness.
Stand by a tree and feel its energy.
Help someone.
Share.
Smile.

Wishing you joy, smiles, laughter and Love for all.  Be you!  Be Love!

13 Comments
April 16, 2014

Knowing vs. Living

To know God
without being God-like
is like trying to swim
without entering water.
—Orest Bedrij

Life is speaking to each of us in a specific way that is perfectly designed so we can hear and understand.  Life chooses the language of experience that will speak to our hearts and bring us toward our truest self as we remember what we are here to do.  Being “God-like” means different things for each one of us and only we know if we are following what it means for us.  Sometimes we may follow easily and stay grounded in the synchronisities of Life’s messages and sometimes we let fear creep in and lead us to distracted meaninglessness or ego based swirling which can only bring suffering.  All of my writing here is my living prayer to live what I know and continue to expand what that means as I strive to help others feel inspired to hear the voice inside them that wants to learn, grow and live what they come to know as well.  We know what we know for a reason and we must follow it home to our God-like selves.  We all have that little spark of God inside us that wants to grow and experience Life.  Living what we know is the way home.

When we can live what we know, our knowing brings us to a peaceful existence.  Knowing without living what we know becomes a burden until we can actually live it.  We each have our own knowing as we navigate what life is showing and saying to us.  No experience is wasted and we are always learning and being shown what we are meant to know and live.  I have experienced the way Life is patient with us for a while as we listen and learn and then Life gives us more and more nudges to move us along towards living more authentically.  The patience life shows us can sometimes wane and the messages can accelerate and become louder and our circumstances more uncomfortable or whatever is necessary to keep us open to evolving as we are meant to.  In some cases, we are too afraid to listen and grow, so life can send us a blow.  I believe that we all know different things and we each find meaning in the perfect things to develop our specific Life path.  There are many different paths to the same essential truths found along all of them.

We all know a lot.  Life has shown us a lot.  Whatever you have read, heard, felt, experienced or seen lately is part of Life speaking to you.  Will you hear it?  Will it change you?  Can you enter the water and swim?  You can!  We all can.  We must.  If we continue to be shown things and do not find ways to live them, Life will turn up the volume on the messages.  We can choose to listen to the whisper that feels like a Universe Hug or we can wait for the nudges, shouts and blows.  Life isn’t trying to annoy us, it’s trying to wake us up.  Let’s wake up with hugs!  We can listen.  We can know.  We can grow and live what we know.

As we set our intentions to live all that we know, Life shows up and gives us the tools that will help us on our path.  We are never without the tools.  We may set them aside for a bit and forget to use them, but they are always available when we are ready to pick them up and use them to stay on the path.  Today, let’s think about what tools we use and let’s commit to using them to help us become more God-like.  My tools are reading, writing, meditation, prayer, compassion, proper nutrition, exercise and connected conversations.  If I focus on these things rather than other distracted fear based habits, peace is more readily available.  Sometimes I can do these things well and sometimes I am over-scheduled, busy and tired and some of these things fall off.  We all have our own set of tools that have brought us closer to our God-like selves.  They are different for each of us.  Some people may find God in singing, dancing or painting.  Our tools are not to feel guilty about when we forget to use them, they are simply to remember and pick up to bring peace again.  Our tools lead to presence, peace and consciousness.  Ultimately, they lead to Love.  Love is always the answer.  Today I pray to remember to use my tools that lead me to Love for All.  That is what God-like means to me — Love For All.  Love is All.  God is All.  You are All.  I Am All.

Thought for the day — If it doesn’t make you feel good, it isn’t love.  If it isn’t Love, it isn’t real.  The real you can replace any thought or feeling that doesn’t feel good with one that comes from Love.  You have an infinite amount of love inside you.  Love is the only real thing.  Don’t try to push unpleasant thoughts away, they will only grow, just turn towards Love and replace the thoughts and feelings with Love and Compassion.  You pick what you give your attention to, find a Loving thought to replace the unpleasant one and you are on your way.  You pick.  You will amaze yourself at the amount of Love the real you is capable of.  If you are reading this, you are ready to live this.  The Universe sent it to you.  Thank you for reading this!

Sending you Love and wishing you Joy!

8 Comments
April 9, 2014

Resistance

Somewhere along the path, we come to the moment.  We realize that life can only be lived in the exact moment we are in.  We figure out that our head is full of chattering nonsense that distracts us from the moment and we embark on the work of clearing the mind and embracing the moment.  We want to wake up.  There are many paths and many wonderful souls to help us see our path and live our moments fully.  We only need to listen and we are on our way.  As we begin clearing the field of the mind, we realize right away that we must hack away at the thoughts of the past and all our reactions to it.  Then, it is clear that we must chop down the thoughts about future worry.  All this makes perfect sense.  Get rid of past and future thoughts to clear the mind and come fully into the moment.  Of course in the case of the mind, one cannot simply plow the field, we dance with the mind and attempt various ways of allowing the thoughts to pass through until they barely get our attention anymore.  We don’t try to get rid of the thoughts, that would only make them bigger, we simply learn to put our attention elsewhere.  We learn to awaken to alert presence and reserve our attention for the thoughts that come from our higher selves and actually mean something.  That all makes perfect sense and will keep us busy for as long as it takes, but it is not the whole picture.  Accessing the moment is made up of much more.  Next up, resistance.  It comes in many forms and we must learn what it does to the moment in both subtle and obvious ways.

It is easy to “be in the moment” when things are going our way or we like the circumstances.  What happens when it is all going “wrong”?  As soon as we are resisting anything the present moment has to offer, we have slipped back into sleep.  Our mind will become busy wishing things were different or planning ways to make change.  We must embrace whatever the moment brings.  We won’t lose our way or become numb to life.  Life will show us how to flow and live in a much more alert and awakened state.  We will be one with life.  For me, learning about perception has helped a lot.  We must be willing to look at all our programmed perceptions on life.  We must open to the idea that we really don’t know what is good or bad.  We can evolve out of labeling everything and arranging things to fit into one category or another.  Watching our resistance to things and letting go of our attachments to what “should” be is a wonderful practice.  Not and easy one.  But, a wonderful one.  Peace replaces resistance, one moment at a time.

“To offer no resistance to life is to be in a state of grace, ease, and lightness. This state is then no longer dependent upon things being in a certain way, good or bad. It seems almost paradoxical, yet when your inner dependency on form is gone, the general conditions of your life, the outer forms, tend to improve greatly. Things, people, or conditions that you thought you needed for your happiness now come to you with no struggle or effort on your part, and you are free to enjoy and appreciate them – while they last. All those things, of course, will still pass away, cycles will come and go, but with dependency gone there is no fear of loss anymore. Life flows with ease.”  ― Eckhart Tolle

These are wonderfully comforting words from Eckhart Tolle.  Also ambitious.  We can do it!  It’s not too ambitious if it is grounded in letting go and letting life live us.  We can set our intentions to observe and allow resistance to pass through or to teach us something.  Let’s look at a few forms of resistance and its antidotes.

General Resistance – When we first begin watching our resistance to things in the moment, it may be surprising how much we resist one thing or another.  We have a lot of ideas about good/bad and right/wrong.  We spend a lot of wasted energy resisting what already is and wishing for something else.  We live in distraction rather than actually living what the moment is trying to show us.  We must be willing to accept that we don’t really know what is ultimately good/bad or right/wrong.  We don’t have to roll over and accept everything, but we must really look at what is just a programmed reaction and what really deserves our energy and attention.  It is exhausting to label everything and try to make it all go our way.  Our resistance plays a part in this.  Acceptance doesn’t bring more of what we think we don’t want, it actually opens up a place to receive more or what we are meant to have.  We can know we are meant to experience certain things because we already are experiencing them; we don’t have to wonder if this experience is meant for us because it is already happening.  With acceptance of what already is, no experience is wasted.  It is a delicate dance.  As we let go of all the little resistances we have in general, we can flow more deeply with our true being that allows us to know when something really is or is not right for us.  Our general resistance to life can dissolve and then we can learn to trust true resistance in a more meaningful way.

Subtle Resistance – I noticed this one more recently.  As our awareness of resistance helps us release it along the way, we can get better at accepting things and letting go of our resistance habits.  Even just acknowledging that we are resisting is helpful in the process and will move us along in our practice.  Then, we can hopefully open our eyes wider and see the ripples of resistance that are still playing a part in our interactions with life.  Sometimes we have this little voice that continues to subtly resist things as we go along.  A little nagging thing that says, “that is not right” or “that won’t happen to me” or “I can’t believe they did that.”  One particular example springs to mind where I noticed my subtle resistance ripples.  Many parents of older children seem to love to compliment my children on their choices/manners/habits and then proceed to tell me, “Just wait until they are older….” and then describe how horrible they will inevitably be when they become teenagers.  I noticed myself having this little, “that won’t be us” reaction inside.  Silly to give my energy towards resisting what someone else is experiencing or sharing.  Who knows what will happen when my kids are older?  Why give my energy and peaceful power away in the moment of someone else describing their situation?  Resistance shows up in many subtle ways.  After I noticed this particular recurring one, I consciously made an effort to allow people’s comments to just flow through me.  I chose to truly be there to really hear them and listen with my heart about their situation rather than making it about me and what may or may not happen to my family.  I can have an open heart rather than a reaction full of resistance.  It is helpful to notice even the subtle ripple of this waste of time and energy response called resistance.  We all have these subtle resistance patters happening to show us how to grow further into detachment and acceptance of all that is.

Providing Resistance – You know the saying, “Whatever you resist persists.”  Well, it’s true.  No exception.  If you are resisting something in any situation, it grows in power and presses harder.  You literally give the thing you are resisting something to butt up against and push on.  If you let things pass through  you and have detached acceptance working for you then things can flow through.  Parenting offers a lot of opportunities to practice this one.  It is always interesting to balance when to let things be and when to step in and handle the thing I think I can’t allow or tolerate.  I have seen the magic of not providing that resistance anymore and the situation completely diffusing itself.  All of our relationships allow places to practice no longer providing that resistance.  Life opens up for us when we no longer resist it.

Avoidance and Numbing Resistance – Sometimes we just don’t want to feel something, don’t want to face something and/or don’t want to deal with something.  We use all kinds of distraction methods to avoid actually experiencing the things we are meant to.  If we are honest with ourselves, we know what methods we are using and we can see how it would feel to just drop the distractions and experience what is waiting for us in the magic of the moment.  Maybe we don’t need the television on, maybe we don’t need to surf the internet or waste time on our smart phones, maybe we don’t need that cocktail to relax us, maybe we’re not really hungry and don’t need that snack, maybe we don’t need all those busy plans that keep us from going deeper inside to open to more of life.  We know when we are avoiding and numbing out rather than pushing through and fearlessly experiencing life found in the precious present moment.  The moment is Life.  We can handle whatever form it comes in by grounding ourselves in the moment rather than in distraction and avoidance.

Past and Future Resistance – Often, we see someone or experience something through the veil of the past or worry about the future.  We may see someone we have not had a “good” experience with in the past, and we only interact with them from the perception of the past.  The person in front of us is completely different from the last time we saw them and so are we.  If we remain stuck in past experience of them, we are not in the moment and we are using past experiences to resist what may be available to us in the present moment.  Instead of living with an open heart in the moment, we are closing the door to the experience that was meant for us.  The encounter with the very same person may be quite lovely if we can see them with fresh loving eyes that have only the present moment in mind.  The same thing goes for future worry.  We may be resisting what is happening in the moment because we fear what it will cause in the future.  But, we are not really experiencing the moment if we are caught up in the future.  We must stay right where we are at and allow all that is meant to happen in the exact moment we are in.  The “future” will only come in the form of another moment.  We can handle all of them as they come.

Creative Resistance – As we continue our practice of letting go of our resistance to life and opening up to the moment, we can observe and understand our resistance in a more meaningful way.  We are all here to do something and we are all co-creators in this life.  The more we get in touch with our truest purpose, the more we must be willing to push through our resistance.  We are sure to encounter much resistance as we approach that which we are meant to do.  The stakes get higher and fear can take a stronger hold on us as we muster our courage to try.  Here are a few favorite quotes on this type of resistance.

“Are you paralyzed with fear? That’s a good sign. Fear is good. Like self-doubt, fear is an indicator. Fear tells us what we have to do. Remember one rule of thumb: the more scared we are of a work or calling, the more sure we can be that we have to do it.” ― Steven Pressfield, The War of Art: Break Through the Blocks & Win Your Inner Creative Battles

Resistance is experienced as fear; the degree of fear equates to the strength of Resistance. Therefore the more fear we feel about a specific enterprise, the more certain we can be that that enterprise is important to us and to the growth of our soul. That’s why we feel so much Resistance. If it meant nothing to us, there’d be no Resistance.” ― Steven Pressfield, The War of Art: Break Through the Blocks & Win Your Inner Creative Battles

There is only ever love or fear.  Resistance is just another form of fear.  Sometimes it’s just general stuff from programmed labels we resist, sometimes subtle ripples persist as we learn to gain more presence, sometimes we let resistance nurture bad habits and sometimes we listen to resistance and realize it is the strongest around things we are truly meant to do.  As we become better masters of our own various types of resistance, we will be able to let the waves of fear pass through and turn to love and even push through the important resistance that came to show us we are on the right track.  We can listen to the fear and resistance and act from our soul to overcome and pass through to our life’s purpose.  We can live each moment in love.

Wishing us all the courage and wisdom to listen to life and let go of resistance.  Wishing us the ability to know when to let resistance pass through without giving it our attention and when we should take note and push through it to our higher calling.  There is so much waiting for us in the moment.  Learning to listen and open with acceptance of with already is is a great way to open the door to the life we are meant to have with all the love we are meant to feel.

Sending you love and joy!

8 Comments
March 6, 2014

Living The Questions of Your Life

‘Instead of asking, “What do I want from life?”, a more powerful question is, “What does life want from me?’ —Eckhart Tolle

It is a miracle to be here.  We are all here to do something.  We are all shaped by our experiences.  Every experience is meaningful.  We become who we are meant to be so we may bring what we are meant to bring to this world.  We are connected to Everything; there is no-one and no-thing we are not connected to.  Our choices, intentions, interactions and energies ripple out to others and come back to us.  Once we are aware of all this happening, synchronicities abound that connect us to more of ourselves while enhancing others’ ability to do the same.  The Universe/God works perfectly in assisting all of this, but once we are aware of it, we co-create with Life.  This all happens, not by figuring out the answers to life, but by asking and living the right questions.  We all have specific questions we are working with at any given time to assist us along the way.

To live a question, we must acknowledge and accept that we don’t know the answer.  We are then in the unknown.  The unknown is where we can experience more of life.  We must open to the present and live each experience fully to get from it what we are meant to.  In this way, we embrace the art of not labeling situations and accepting that all things are unfolding as they should no matter what the details appear to be.  We widen our perspective.  We no longer need to declare if things are good or bad.  We just flow with the circumstances and try to hear what life is saying to us and what question it is presenting for us.  We let go of seeking the answers as we flow with the questions.  Seeking answers requires future and creates the illusion that we will be somehow better or more complete once we have them.  This can only create suffering as we long for a moment other than the one we are in.  We receive only the answers we are ready for and they change over time and circumstance.  The Divine joy and love is in the questions and allowing them to flow through you at the perfect time for you.

Once we know how to live the questions, we can dwell in peace that has tinges of fearless excitement within.  We won’t sit idly by and simply watch everything, we will live authentically with clarity and purpose as we ground our actions in our true essence.  Life will show us how to do this if we can only listen.

Watch the synchronicity in your life.  Watch the dots connect.  Notice what you are meant to receive from each person you come into contact with.  Notice what you can give back in return.  Be with nature in a way that fills your energy to assist your higher frequency vibration.  Watch your conversations.  Notice the books that appear at just the right time.  Notice Divine energy assisting you.  Be kind to yourself.  Forget trying to know and embrace living the unknown.  See the beauty all around.  BE nature instead of in nature.  Listen with all your heart.  You can function this way always, you don’t have to return to surviving and struggling all the time.  Peace can envelope you as you live your questions and evolve to the next, never rushing or resisting, just living in the present.

Lean back and look at the whole of your life.  See how it has all connected in meaningful ways to shape you into who you are now.  See all the ways that Life has provided for you.  Let that feeling embrace you.  I call it a Universe hug and I believe that the more you can feel those hugs, the more frequently you receive them.  We all need hugs.  Feel that hug from the Universe and love and embrace who you are now without judging how you got here or where you should be instead.  Just love you now and connect to everything around you as you expand and fill up with peace.

Living the unknown and loving the questions, the “little me” in us quiets down and the larger “I” that is connected to all things Lives.  It is a Divine paradox to realize that the only true knowing is found in living peacefully in the Unknown.  The question IS the knowing.  Living the question is living what you know.

Today I pray to be still and live the question of my heart.  I pray to gratefully and peacefully abide in the joy of connectedness to All.  I pray to remember this message as I live the moments of my day.

I am sending you love!  May you hear your question and feel the joy of living authentically with it.

12 Comments
February 28, 2014

Fresh Eyes

Whatever we look at today, may we see it with fresh eyes.

All too often, we look with the eyes of yesterday.  We allow our past experiences and judgments to drag us through our life and relive themselves again and again.  This isn’t living.  We can’t fully come to the present moment and live our soul’s purpose and essence until we can put down our veil of perception grown in the past and grounded in fear and future.

We can practice looking at the world and everything in it with fresh, clear, new eyes.  When we do, we will experience the flow of life in miraculous ways.  We can shift how we experience everything.  Everything that passes through our vision has our thoughts attached to it as we take it in.  We look and attach a label, draw on past experiences as we assume they will repeat themselves and then react accordingly.  Living this way, we miss the actual moment and what may be possible within it entirely.  We can change the thoughts we attach and open up to the Life we already have waiting for us to experience it fully.

I arrive again and again at the miraculous truth that the unknown is all there really is and it is much better than knowing everything…or at least thinking we do.  We really don’t know what the future holds and we would have much more peace if we didn’t feel the need to know.  As we shift our perceptions and feel what is really going on in the Divine Universe, we can begin to trust that whatever lies in the unknown is far better than anything we can conjure up with our little ideas about how things should go.  Even when things seem to be against us, we usually see the reason it was the perfect for us later.  We can trust it all.  It is so much more meaningful and, in fact, fun, to just go with the flow and see what happens.  My favorite saying lately is simply, “I don’t know, let’s see what happens.”  It is a joyful relief that comforts me so…much better than gripping life too tight and continuously striving for some semblance of control.  That “control” only blocks Life and all its miracles.

We never really know what we are looking at…even the most familiar things.  Once things become familiar to us we no longer see them.  We must make the effort to see them fresh.  It will awaken our soul and we will come alive to Life simply by seeing what is really there in front of us rather than seeing our thoughts attached to it.

Yesterday at the grocery story, I saw my kids beside me with absolutely fresh eyes.  The magical love I felt gave me chills all over.  They looked like little miracles standing there near me.  I felt like the luckiest person alive just to have them hanging out with me.  I watched them for a few moments, one intently looking through items at the counter and one surveying the people all around…it was as if I had never seen them before.  I saw them so clearly and I knew throughout my being that I have been blessed in the most amazing way.   I could have been distractedly handling that grocery line moment that we have been through what seems like millions of times…instead I was there with fresh eyes and filled with the tingle of Life running through my senses.

I cherish John O’Donohue’s words on the unfamiliar…with gratitude I keep his lessons on seeing the unfamiliar in the most familiar things close to my heart.  I love what A Course In Miracles taught me and continues to teach me about perception.  I try to remember these lessons as I go through my days…sometimes with fresh eyes, often a bit blurry with flashes of clarity.  Recently in my reading, Mark Nepo spoke of these ideas as “love at first sight”… it opened up a new understanding in me.  I like the term “love at first sight” used in this way.  That was what happened to me at the grocery store.  I looked at two of the most familiar people in the world to me and my eyes were so fresh that it was indeed Love At First Sight!  Perhaps that is why they say love is all that matters and love is all there is…because when you get your eyes right…love is all you can see and all you can Be.

These ideas are not reserved for easy situations and circumstances.  We can apply them to Everything.  These fresh new eyes are the ones to use even if we have people in our lives that we feel have wronged us or our loved ones or are in conflict with us in some way, we can look at them with fresh eyes and live only what is in the actual moment in our meetings with them.  We don’t have to bring our past experiences with tough people to every interaction with them and we don’t have to replay old movies in our head of how we already know them and what they are all about.  We are never exactly the same in any two moments, we can meet everyone fresh in the moment we are actually in.  If we can do that, we will surely see that things are always much better in the actual moment without brining all the thoughts about it to keep us distracted or reliving past moments.

Everything around us can feel how we are using our eyes and other senses.  Our eyes can bring love or fear.  When we’re fresh and present, everything expands to be more fully and authentically alive…even the flower can stand taller.  We open life up and we live authentically.  The simple choice to use our senses to see things fresh brings the frequency of love that is all there really is to see.

Wishing you countless moments filled with the true and infinite “Love At First Sight” that is always available to us.  May we all have the courage to look at it all anew.  Let’s see it all fresh!

Sending you love and joy!  May the tingle of Life run through your senses!

7 Comments
January 30, 2014

Love Everything…It Makes Everything Loveable

Meet Mouska The Duck!

Mouska 1

Mouska has taught our family many lessons about love.  I want to share some of what we have learned here.  The picture above shows what Mouska looked like the day he came into our lives.  We were on a family vacation and we told the kids they could pick out a souvenir in the hotel gift shop.  George spotted a little duck on the top shelf in the back corner beyond our reach, we had to ask for assistance to get him down.  Once in Georgie’s sweet little hands, he was immediately hugged and named Mouska.

George changed the day he got Mouska and the little duck changed as well.  George tapped into his loving and nurturing side as he showered this little duck with so much love that continued expanding toward many more things in his life.  Mouska ceased being a little ducky made of terry cloth and stuffed with cotton…he came to life for George, and soon after, for our whole family and even many friends.  The love Georgie felt for him made him so lovable to the rest of us.  We all love this little ducky dearly.  He isn’t just a stuffed animal, he is love.  He became lovable because he was loved so much.  Georgie became more of his natural loving self by having the sweet relationship with his beloved Mouska.

George and Mouska have been together for over four years now.  They have been through many things together.  That sweet little duck has been all over with us.  He even survived being left behind at a Disneyland hotel and getting a “makeover”… George fully understood what it meant that Mouska had gotten a makeover…he felt the loss and embraced the solution.  When the new Mouska arrived in the mail all fresh and fluffy again, the love was no less.  Mouska’s spirit and all the love and precious memories had moved on and inhabited the “refurbished” version.  What a lucky duck and what a lucky ducky family we are.  We all love Mouska so much.

Mouska and George’s little family has expanded over the years; they have plenty of love to share.  Meet Coco and James.  They are a loving little bunch.  At first I resisted more and more animals coming to live and sleep in George’s bed…but Mouska and George live the lesson that there is plenty of love to go around…there is no limit.  George does a great job sharing the love, leaving no one out, making everyone feel special and creating joyful moments with all his little buddies, no matter how many in number.

Mouska 3

The family has continued to grow and much love is always beaming out of the room and lingering around the house.  The current gang that lives and sleeps on George’s bed are Mouska the duck, James the Monkey, Coco the big bear, Ben the little bear, Dan the big giraffe, Bob the little giraffe, Snoopy the dog, Eagie the eagle and Jones the jellybean duck.

Mouska family

There are stories of love behind each animal.  Many were precious gifts from loved ones, one was George’s first purchase with his own money.  I have watched these little love stories and felt more of my own heart along the way.  It truly is amazing to see these little spirits come to life just by being loved.

The lessons of Mouska and friends makes me think…What else could be changed just by being loved?  The real question is…what wouldn’t be changed by being loved?  I love this Emerson quote…

Treat a man as he is, and he will remain as he is.  Treat a man as he could be, and he will become what he should be.”  –Ralph Waldo Emerson

If Mouska had been treated like terry cloth and cotton, none of this love would have been felt.  He was treated like family and filled with love and he gave it back to us.  More Mouska lessons show just how much we benefit from giving love.  The more love you give, the more love you have to give.  We all know all these things of course, but I am so grateful for our little ducky friend and Georgie who live them so clearly for us to witness, allowing us to expand our own love from having seen them.

Some things are easy to love and some are more difficult.  We must learn to love it all and spread love wherever we go so there can be more love for everything and everyone to feel.  Love is always the answer.  No matter what we are going through or who is appearing before us, we can always step back and put some space between the thing or person and our reaction to it.  If we can add space and stillness, very soon, we can feel our heart soften and our willingness to act from love expand and fill us.  It is always possible and with more and more practice, it becomes much more automatic…we can more easily embrace what we are truly capable of…pure love.  We truly can love everything and make everything more lovable.  It is a practice, but it is worth it.  I pray to get better and better at it each and every day…just a breath, or a moment can help us be our truest self, with plenty of love to give to every circumstance.  Some things take a few more breaths or a bit more time, but watching the process can shorten the time between our little reaction and the true one that comes from our heart to add love to the world.

These days Mouska isn’t as fluffy as he used to be.  He has lost his hair twice and he is quite worn by love now.  Each year at his birthday party (yes, the kids throw him a birthday party each year), it is easy to see he is changing over time and his experiences are showing.  But, no matter how flat he becomes or how much fluff he loses, the love for him is still growing.  I love to think that all of us aren’t aging, we’re simply showing our experiences and being worn in with love.

Wishing you the space to live from the place of love for all things that transforms how you see the world and how you can BE in the world.  Lets leave nothing on the top shelf unloved, lets pull it all down and fill it with love.  No matter what it appears to be…love can change it!

Sending you so much love and joy today and always.  Happy love spreading!

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January 26, 2014

Words

Words have always meant a lot to me.  They are much more than just communication tools; when treated with honor and respect, they become much more.  The words we string together to express ourselves and the ones we choose to give our attention to as we gather information make up the fabric of who we are.  Words are our bridge to the soul.  They come from somewhere else, they come through us and they can reach out to another and bring them to us.  They can be used well and allow us to be more of ourselves and they can be mistreated and keep us stuck in destructive patterns that take us off our true path.  Words are the dots and our job in life is to get better and better at connecting the dots.

Words are always working with us; our relationship with them is how we grow and change.  I have seen my relationship with words evolve drastically over time and I can feel the pull to a deeper connection with them now.  Ever a crafty communicator, I remember in my younger years using my words carelessly at times.  I was a bit of a people pleaser and could easily tell people what they wanted to hear or say things that might make people more comfortable, etc.  During adolescence, honesty wasn’t really at the tip-top of my list either, words were more of a navigation tool to try to get what I wanted or seem like something I was trying to be.  All these things were part of a natural progression through awkward years I suppose.  I am so grateful to have passed through that time and to have it to look back on now to know the difference.  I now know that compromising my own truth and absolute honesty is like cutting myself off from life and love and completely unnecessary in any and every situation.  I can still make others feel comfortable, but compromising my words or using them carelessly is never ever part of that anymore.

Words have been everything to me on my path.  I have watched them connect to each other to lead me to the next book, the next conversation, the next experience, the next challenge, life lesson, goal, etc… They have guided me, comforted me, confronted me, pushed me, loved me and helped me put pieces of my soul together as I journey toward aligning my personality with my soul to live in authenticity.  They whisper and shout, they figure out how we hear them best and they never stop trying to get our attention, wake us up, lead us where we are meant to go to show up as exactly who we are and with what we are meant to bring to this world.  Words are everywhere and they reach us through the perfect means for us…Life sends us a book, someone says something to us, a poem touches us, a loved one shares with us, we see a sign, watch a movie, receive a letter, hear them in silence, hear ourselves say them aloud, we spontaneously feel something deeply and try to put it into words…they are everywhere.

The first of the four agreements in Don Miguel Ruiz’s book, The Four Agreements is — Be Impeccable With Your Word.  He calls this agreement the most important and he is so right.  This may seem straightforward and easily obvious at first, but it is much more than just telling the truth.  It means really honoring your word and truly expressing your intentions and fullest expression of yourself in every situation and every moment.  It means knowing that the words come from the source that creates your life.  As you use your words, you create your life.  Your inner peace is directly tied to how you are using your words in your life.  By saying exactly what you mean, meaning what you say,  using your words wisely and carefully towards and about others, selecting carefully which words you give your attention to, setting your intention clearly in all you do, not making compromises with your words to please others or make them more comfortable, etc., you bring honor to all the words in life and they start speaking to you more clearly.  When you can hear the words more clearly, you can live more deeply…you can tap into the flow of Life.

I have never ever been accused of being a woman of few words.  In fact, sometimes here in my writing I try to keep it short and sweet and it just doesn’t work for me.  It doesn’t come naturally.  I have always been pretty good at explaining things and communicating somewhat effectively, but doing so in just a few words has never been my strong point.  I have been through many phases with words in my life and I feel myself entering a new phase with them in my daily life now…I deeply desire uttering less of them.  It feels a bit strange for someone who thrives on good conversation and cherishes words so very much, but it is definitely what I am feeling drawn to.  Here are some possible reasons saying fewer words may be so appealing to me at this point:

  • Perhaps I am getting more words out in my writing and I feel less of a need for over-communicating as my soul takes comfort in having expressed what is most meaningful to me.  (It truly is a comfort to have somewhere to express all of these things!)
  • Perhaps I finally understand how many of the words we utter are wasted on labeling things and judging situations, which takes us from the joy of living.
  • Perhaps the prayer and meditation I am attempting to get better at is seeping into my daily life and calling to me there.
  • Perhaps my great love and deep gratitude for words and all they have done for me has made me want to honor them more.  I do love words!
  • Perhaps, it’s because I am a sometimes tired Mommy who finds herself repeating the same things over and over and over again to the little ones, and I’m just tired of hearing myself.
  • Perhaps I am ready to give my energy towards being instead of saying.
  • Perhaps I have learned from the great sages that much wisdom can be said with very little to no words.
  • Perhaps I have figured out that the joy lies in stillness which can easily be covered over with unnecessary distractions and interruptions and I am finding more ways to live in the joy of the actual moment rather than talking about another moment.
  • Perhaps my being is growing and knows that it is okay to set the personality aside.
  • Perhaps I’m frustrated and wish I could live all that I know more and feel like quieting down to do it better and more consistently…
  • Perhaps its just human nature and we evolve toward it naturally… my beautiful Granny doesn’t say a whole lot, but when she does, its worth hearing.  She says a lot more with her lovely spirit, always positive attitude and loving demeanor.  Just to sit in her company is like having a great conversation.

Who knows why I want to say fewer words at this point in life…maybe it is a bit of all of these things.  I just feel like saying fewer words as I honor each one of them more.  As I try to listen and honor what I am feeling, its been a bit of a struggle so far…those around me seem to be used to me saying a lot…so they aren’t quite comfortable with it yet.  Or, maybe its me who is adjusting to more quiet and letting things be as I allow more stillness and try to quiet the noise.  It feels exhausting and disappointing when I revert back to too many words as I break this habit…it will come though I am sure.  It’s a work in progress.  I’ll keep you posted.  It is a nice calming shift when I can do it and I am grateful for it…it has been interesting to feel the work of words inside me and to watch the relationship with words evolve.  Love is always the answer I am sure…I can love myself and those around me through the process of growth and change.  Love is.

Wishing us all the courage and wisdom to really look at what we are saying, how we are listening, what we are reading, watching, thinking, allowing in and sharing with others.  Wishing us the joy of deep listening and the miracle of connecting the little dots called words.

Sending you joy and love (and lots of words) today and always!

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January 10, 2014

Becoming The Ocean

If you don’t become the ocean, you’ll be seasick every day.  –Leonard Cohen

This quote is such a great realization.  I came across it in my reading this week and it put all I was feeling into clear, loving and true perspective.  To live on the surface of life, where we allow our inner state to depend on our outer circumstances is rocky, stormy and sickening.  It does feel like navigating during fluctuating storms that just keep rolling in.  It is possible to live from down deep in calm waters and to be fluid as we flow through life with the understanding that the moment is all we have and things are happening just as they should.  How do we do it?  We use every experience we encounter to build more presence in us, to ground us in our true essence of love and connectedness to all things…which can only be found in the present moment.

As we grow our presence and ability to live from the quiet place inside us, we still have to navigate the circumstances and people around us.  As we get better at this, the opportunities to practice it seem to mount.  We all have loved ones we hold dear and often those very relationships are the ones that allow us to grow the most.  I spend a lot of time with my two precious little ones.  They bring so much joy, laughter and moments of love, but, they also bring many many opportunities to practice all of the things I have learned about presence and consciousness.  If I didn’t have the day-to-day challenges with the kids, I would probably have myself convinced that I have evolved to a much higher level of consciousness.  I have little encounters with them all the time that remind me of what I can work on and just where I am at.  It is a gift to have these two to work with as I try to stay in the deep waters for longer periods of time and teach them to do the same.

Here’s the thing, the kids are constantly trying to pull me into feeling whatever they are feeling and as they grow and encounter new challenges and responsibilities, their emotions are all over the place.  Sometimes it feels like living with little emotional bandits, taking me on a ride over getting their jacket, tackling a math problem, clearing the table or tying their shoes, etc.  They are little, vulnerable and highly identified with me.  If they are stressed or upset about something, they want me in the same state.  I think they feel that if I am feeling the same stress, they will feel better or get help; its like they feel that if I’m upset too, they won’t be alone in it.  I can feel the pull between the three of us of how they want company in their emotions.  I am always trying to live from a place of non-reaction by putting more space around my choices.  It is kind of funny to hang out with people who really really want to get a reaction out of you when you so badly want to stop reacting to everything that comes your way.  There is a kind of perfection in it that allows me to feel just how connected I am to everything and how God/Life lines up the perfect circumstances to grow you to be more of your essential self.

You can be sure that whatever circumstances you are working with, they are the exact, perfect ones made just for you that will deliver you to all that you are meant to experience on the path leading in the direction of becoming more of who you really are.  Whenever I hit a bump or fall flat on my face by forgetting everything I know, I can feel the meaning in the experience and be grateful for whatever the details looked like.  Me and my little emotional bandits get up and forgive each other pretty quickly and jump back into the joy of life.  We talk openly about all these things, so they are learning right alongside me.  They teach me so much in such a pure way.

Let’s have a moment of get-real perspective here; perception is always a great teacher, it is usually a good idea to flip things around and see how they look from the other side.  As I was thinking about the “emotional bandits” part of things, I realized that I am an emotional bandit as well.  I have heard myself say, “Why can’t we just be in the moment?”, “Let’s get into the flow of life.”, “Joy is waiting for you whenever you’re ready.”, and many more such statements.  It would seem that I, too, am guilty of resisting the emotions others are experiencing and trying to get them to feel something I want to feel.  Even if I am trying to get them to feel “good” things, it is still me trying to get those around me to feel and act the way I want them to, so that it can come more easily to me as well.  To be honest, I have seen myself in bad times trying to get others to feel bad with me too.  It is a hard thing to admit, but as I look at things from this perspective, I cringe at some of the times I was down, stressed or overwhelmed and my husband was happily buzzing around and I dragged him through my emotions just to have some company.  Fear makes us do all kinds of weird things.  Thank goodness we have always come out of it pretty quickly and we know where it all comes from.  The yuckie stuff is always fear and the lovely stuff is love…no exception.

So, we all do it…we all try to bring our loved ones with us on our little emotional trips.  As we ride the waves in a storm, it is lonely to do it alone…we seek company and we drag them into our boat because we are afraid of making the trip alone.  Once we can learn to live from a more spacious place that allows others to have their feelings and express what they’re going through without it affecting our state of mind, we can be free of the seasickness and truly taste the freedom of acceptance, present moment living and inner peace.  Next time you notice an emotional bandit trying to take you for a ride, just give them love and let it pass through you.  Try comforting them by intense listening that allows them to be heard without resistance from you that would cause them to try to convince you and pull you into their emotional boat.  If you notice yourself trying to take others for your emotional ride, turn towards love and remember that everything passes, things are always as they should be and even though it feels like it would be lonely to go it alone…it isn’t.  Sometimes we just need to feel our feelings deeply and pass through them alone to let them lose their power over us.  We can grow and become more of who we really are by swimming deeper, feeling more stillness and realizing that we aren’t ever truly alone…we are connected to all that is around us…what we can see and what we cannot.

Picture it, if you are living at the surface of life, riding the waves, you need that little boat and you constantly seek company in there to endure all the seasickness and storms.  If you are the ocean, you don’t need the boat.  You don’t need to get in the boat with others and you don’t need to drag others into yours.  You can just be the ocean and heal yourself and others as you spread love and stay calm and peaceful in the moment.

Sending you love, calm, peace, joy and presence.

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December 14, 2013

A Great Conversation

Nothing delights me like a great conversation!  To really connect with someone and find a piece of yourself in the connection is like a little window to the soul.  As I mentioned in my previous post, I love John O’Donohue’s description of what a great conversation is.  I previously suggested taking the time and provided the link to hear my favorite interview with him (see previous post); I genuinely hope you can gift yourself with this wonderful conversation.  I realize, however, that my favorite part takes place around the forty-second minute…I understand that not everyone will feel as though they can spare the 51 minutes and 9 seconds listening to this discussion would take.  For those without the time to hear his wonderful words, I want to share a bit more of my favorite part here (please read with a fierce Irish accent…it makes it even better)…

“You have to ask yourself, ‘When is the last time that you had a great conversation?’  A conversation which wasn’t just two intersecting monologues, which is what passes for conversation a lot in this culture.  But when had you last a great conversation in which you overheard yourself saying things that you never knew you knew, that you heard yourself receiving from somebody words that absolutely found places within you that you thought you had lost and a sense of an event of a conversation that brought the two of you on to a different plain, and then fourthly, a conversation that continued to sing in your mind for weeks afterwards.” –John O’Donohue

He goes on to talk about some great conversations he has had lately… he describes them as “food and drink for the soul”… In his next words he says the second thing to always ask one’s self is, “Who are you reading and where are you stretching your own boundaries?”… which prompts, of course, more lovely conversation.  This man is a poet, everything he says is like music!  He covers so many topics in this talk, but for me, great conversation is worth spending some time on.

I love how he describes the common conversations in our culture as “two intersecting monologues”…that is so true!  You can feel it when someone is just waiting to say their next thing and not really interested in what you have to say.  You can also feel it in yourself when you’re doing the same thing — just waiting for them to pause so you can talk.  It is deadening for the soul.  I often find that people are surprised when someone really listens to them.  I can feel it when their heart comes alive a bit more and they just open right in front of me.  It does hurt when someone can’t listen to you, but it isn’t something to take personally (nothing is).  People will listen more when they are ready.  We can help them along by truly listening to them and honoring them with our fullest attention and interest.

The holidays are upon us, we’re blessed with so many moments of family togetherness and friendly celebrations this time of year; now would be a lovely time to practice having great conversations.  They don’t have to be as deep as what John O’Donohue describes above, it would be nice if they could be, but we just have to start somewhere.  When we’re with our loved ones and friends and even meeting new friends (every friend was once a stranger), we can bring honor to the words we share with them by truly being there with them and listening to what they may share with us.  Your heart and soul know how to do it, you just let yourself be there in the moment and your soul will do the talking, and more importantly, the listening.  Dare to ask great questions and truly listen to the answers.  Have fun with it.  Have joy with it.  Your heart will open and you will feel more fully alive.

Wouldn’t it be lovely if we all really talked to each other as our true selves, without the image of us that we project throughout our days.  It is lovely to truly show up and authentically BE wherever you are at.  It may seem as though it isn’t practical, but it is.  We can truly be where we are at and honor the moments as the sacred gifts they are.  Things are waiting to be seen by you and moments to be experienced by you.  My wish for us all this holiday season is the gift of great conversation that awakens the soul and comforts the heart.

May you see kindness wherever you look and spread joy wherever you go!  Sending you love and joy!

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December 12, 2013

The Gift of John O’Donohue

 

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John O’Donohue’s work has been an amazing gift in my life.  I hope you will take some time to listen to this wonderful discussion with Krista Tippett from On Being (onbeing.org).  She sat down with him just before his passing.  May you give yourself the gift of listening long enough to hear his voice and feel his passion as he shares so much about what is most meaningful for our souls…  When I first heard it years ago, it spoke to a deep place inside me.  I am ready to revisit his work now and bless myself with all the healing it brings.  I love how these lessons expand and go deeper each time we open to more of them.  My favorite part of this interview is when he says in his amazing Irish accent, “You’ve got to ask yourself, ‘When was last time you had a great conversation?'” …he says it with such depth and reverence for what I hold so dear…my heart nearly jumped out of my chest when I heard it the first time.  I knew I was meant to know about him and the essence of this interview feels like a magnificent conversation…with him.  What a blessing!

I heard bits and pieces of it this morning and knew it is just what my soul is craving right now.  This is a gift I am giving myself today, during this busy holiday season.  I want to share it with you so that it may bring comfort, love, joy, and meaningful conversation to your life today and always.  Once you learn about John O’Donohue, you will know what a gift he is to the world.  I read everything I could get my hands on from him.  I am excited today, to realize I am ready to go back and experience that gift once more.  I think that is the perfect Christmas gift to give myself!  Here are some wonderful words from him to share:

“Your soul knows the geography of your destiny. Your soul alone has the map of your future, therefore you can trust this indirect, oblique side of yourself. If you do, it will take you where you need to go, but more important it will teach you a kindness of rhythm in your journey.”
― John O’Donohue, Anam Cara: A Book of Celtic Wisdom

“When love awakens in your life, in the night of your heart, it is like the dawn breaking within you. Where before there was anonymity, now there is intimacy; where before there was fear, now there is courage; where before in your life there was awkwardness, now there is a rhythm of grace and gracefulness; where before you used to be jagged, now you are elegant and in rhythm with your self. When love awakens in your life, it is like a rebirth, a new beginning.”
― John O’Donohue, Anam Cara: A Book of Celtic Wisdom

“One of the most beautiful gifts in the world is the gift of encouragement. When someone encourages you, that person helps you over a threshold you might otherwise never have crossed on your own.”
― John O’Donohue, Eternal Echoes: Celtic Reflections on Our Yearning to Belong

I am sending you and me encouragement today… to slow down, to be open, to find the beauty and meaning in all things, to listen to our souls and be guided by our divinity.  Thank you for encouraging me by taking the time to read this!  I am so very grateful!

I should also note that there is one more amazing gift within this message…onbeing.org.  Do visit the website and dabble in the amazing library of radio shows that are available for us to listen to.  Krista is my all-time-favorite interviewer…a dear friend shared On Being with me years ago and I am forever grateful!

Wishing you so much love and sending you joyous blessings!

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