Help Others…Help Yourself
“It is one of the most beautiful compensations of this life that no person can sincerely help another without helping himself.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson
“There is a mystical law of nature that says the three things we crave most in life — happiness, freedom, and peace of mind — are always attained by giving them to someone else. Your true happiness comes from giving, not getting. It’s the basic precept of all great religions: the Golden Rule.” — John Wooden
We are so connected to each other. When you help someone, you expand and feel more of yourself through that connection. You sense more of your true self, the one that is timeless and connected to everyone and everything…your soul. Helping others takes the focus off our own stuff and allows us to break down a false sense of separation from everything. It is easy to go around feeling separate from the world, but that isn’t real. We are part of it all and with it all. We connect deeply to all the little things around us…those we can see and those we cannot see. The more we can feel those connections, the more we can see them.
The ego seeks to divide and separate. Spirit seeks to unify and heal. –A Course In Miracles
We want to help others from spirit, not ego. The ego loves to see others “in need” and itself as the “helper”…what we’re talking about here isn’t that kind of help. We’re talking about the kind of help that unifies, not the kind that separates.
There are big ways to help others. We can seek them out and give our time, talents, energies and resources to them when we are able. It is important to build in time for giving back and we get so much in return. But, there are also lots of little ways we can help others on a regular basis:
- Listening — People love your full attention. Simply giving it to them can help in so many ways. Your fullest attention to show the other that they are important to you in that moment can heal them and nurture them in many ways. This is for our closest loved ones and anyone we come into contact with throughout our days. Wherever you’re at…that is the perfect place to truly listen to everyone and everything around you. It is a gift for others as well as yourself.
- Eye Contact — This may sound silly, but it is important. There is something magical behind the eyes. We don’t want to be creepy about it and stare too long, but we must honor each other by really looking each other in the eye. There are so many distractions these days that it is easy to keep a wall up. Having that wall up is deadening…it feeds the feeling of separation and creates suffering. Looking into the eyes of others is like a window to the soul.
- Smiling — A true smile feels so good for your heart. Do it right now. Stop reading this and smile your truest deepest smile. Your heart tingles and the connection of it is obvious. Now, imagine spreading that tingle and true form of loving energy wherever you go. You can. Years ago I was walking into a Costco with the kids and two older gentlemen were heading towards us. I smiled and greeted them as we passed each other. As they went on I heard one say to the other, “Wow, there is nothing like a woman’s smile.” I was rather surprised at the time. Now I understand it a bit more and I know what smiles are…true smiles (not the fake ones) from anyone are soul nurturing. Spread the smiles — nurture souls!
- Sharing Your Spirit — I have a few close loved ones that allow me to share my spirit. I also share it here on Live What You Know. My deepest and truest intention and desire when sharing my spirit is always to help others become more of themselves and make great choices as they know more and live more. I can feel how uplifting it is for my spirit when I have touched the stillness and allowed the expression of my spirit to flow through me. I feel so much better when I have quieted the personality and all it’s noise and truly touched the spirit. Those close loved ones I mentioned that allow me to listen to their deepest feelings and concerns about their life situations are such a gift. In listening to them, understanding their journey and responding from a deeper place, I get the gift of spirit flowing through me. If I have truly done it and they can hear it, it is such a miraculous gift. To have spirits share in this way is what connection is all about.
- Being With — Things change and evolve, lifetimes go through a natural expansion and contraction. Everyone is in a different stage of life and viewing life through their own perceptions. Knowing this and accepting the impermanence of all things, we can give more focus to truly being with each other wherever we are at. If we can stop expecting our loved ones to behave in certain ways, we can be with them exactly where they are at. We can be the place of love that allows them to feel loved and accepted as they are. If we can stop expecting things in general, then life can open up and bless us in miraculous ways.
Personal note — I am so grateful for this space to share my spirit. As I wrote this, I had some realizations of my own and I can see ways I can focus my actions towards these points even more. I am grateful that my spirit always has messages for me too! It’s always possible to live what you know a little bit better. Now is always the time because it is the only time that ever is.
Wishing you blessed opportunities to help others and feel the lift in spirit as it helps you in return. Sending you love and joy!